


Dear Lenny,

by AgelessWriter



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Chapters are titled like they are because time gets lost while traveling in time, Letters, M/M, Some Fluff, Some angst, mick is mick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-08-27 11:29:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 12,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8399953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgelessWriter/pseuds/AgelessWriter
Summary: After Len died, Mick's needed to cope. So he turned to writing letters to Len, letters he'd probably never see. He just needed to get it out. (Mick POV)





	1. May...2016?

May 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        Not sure what day it is. Not really sure of the time… I just know… You’re technically dead. But Haircut says that this… That writing things out could help. I can’t light anything or anyone on fire yet… So this’ll have to do.

                        At least you died doing something… Protecting us. But dammit you should have let us… Should have let me go… Let me pay my debts. Asshole. And you gave me the ring? Who am I supposed to give it to? Huh? Lisa?

                        Hell… I tried to tell Lisa after that asshole Englishman left us back in 2016. Did you know he couldn’t take us back to January? He took us to fucking May… And there’s this other speedster. Again.

                        Anyway… Off track… I tried to tell Lisa but I couldn’t find her. Something about her laying low in Hawaii. Probably found a rich hack to shack with for a while. Until she robs him blind. You taught her well.

                        The old man and Haircut think they may be able to contact Hunter. I’ll punch him for you. Promise.

                        Maybe… I’ll mail these to you one day. A younger you.

 

-Mick


	2. May 19, 2016

May 19, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        Killed Savage. Finally. I watched him burn and burn and burn. It was beautiful. And the Hawk people killed him. And then I think Sara killed him.

                        How’d we kill him three times? Time is fucking weird. Let me tell you. Though… Wherever you are… I’m sure you know.

                        Unfortunately… Killing him… Didn’t do much good. For me. Not like I’d like. Englishman let us decide whether or not to come back. The Hawks took off but the rest of us stayed. Thought of it like a vacation or some shit.

                        Sara’s using Gideon to try and find this asshole who killed her sister… I asked if they, she, it? could look for you too... Maybe you’re lost out there…? I dunno… I heard that Flash disappeared for a while and that the Ramon guy saved him from some alternate dimension bullshit, so maybe…?

                        Wishful thinking huh? Don’t worry though, your room… Your side of our room… It’s untouched. Got your gun too. Keep it clean and checked out for you… In case we find you. I won’t stop looking… Promise.

 

-Mick

 


	3. June... 2016?

June of… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Welp… We fucked up. Went to Medieval times… The kid and the old man about got us killed. Damn superheroes. The chick was meant to die at the guillotine. Can’t save ‘em just because they look sweet.

                        Speaking of chicks… Sara fucked with some of the knights… And the ladies-in-waiting… And I’m fairly certain she messed around with the jester… She gets around, and I’m impressed. Though… Without her we probably wouldn’t have been able to stop the idiots trying to bring in chemistry.

                        Yeah… Someone tried to invent ‘chemistry’ early. It didn’t go well..

 

-Mick


	4. June 2016

June of… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Still not sure of the time… But it’s weird. We went to hang out during the American Revolution. I got to see Sara’s stealth moves. Pretty sure we kicked British ass because of her.

                        Not sure why we went… It was a small… Aborhision? Is that what it’s called? Or even how it’s spelled? Whatever. We were looking for it.

                        Looking at Rip, I remember why we went. The English, somehow, won the war. But we helped make sure their asses were kicked. Great times.

                        Kinda miss you though. Even if you did make them damn puns. And sci-fi references… Actually watched one of your movies the other night… Star Wars… The fourth one. Gideon says they still haven’t pinged your location yet… But we’re looking. I’m looking.

 

-Mick


	5. July of... 2016

July of… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Haircut fucked us over. How many times can he lose his damn suit?! Ain’t he supposed to be a genius or some shit?!

                        There we were, in the East, during the time Mongols were showing up. We were prepared, gonna keep these cyborg whatevers from fucking time up. And here comes Palmer flying around in his fancy suit.

                        Do you know what happened to him and that fancy suit? Yeah. He got shot. He went down. And then there was smoke. We couldn’t see, but we knew he was taken. Had to rescue his ass and save the timeline at the same time.

                        Damn I wish I could kill him sometimes… I need a drink… Or twelve…

 

-Mick


	6. August... 2016?

August… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        The idiot was knighted. He was knighted by some Queen… Think we were in Spain… I think. They spoke Spanish anyway. Could have been England. I was drunk. Had to be to deal with his smug ass afterward.

                        Been training with Sara. Even though I was… Kronos… I need practice. Hell, don’t get a body like mine just sitting around… Kinda wish you’d been there though… Training with you was always more fun… Different kind of fun usually since we’d end up against a wall… But still…

                        The missions have been running together… Guess I’m starting to blur it…

 

                        I don’t know if I’ll ever send these to a younger you… Maybe Lisa… Or Flash. Let them keep a record of you. Never let them forget who you were. Are. That you gave them a run for their money.

                        Heh. Run.

                         

 

-Mick

 


	7. September... 2016?

September… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Well… This was fun. We went to France. 18th century France I believe… It was… Interesting. Rip almost blew a head gasket though.

                        So there we were, all dolled up to blend in and there are these high tech assassins. So we’re fighting them _Three Musketeers_ style, me and Rip. Jax and Stein fucked up first. They formed their Firestorm thing. Then Ray showed up in his suit.

                        Finally Sara shows up, after the fight, her dress all messed up. Turns out, she’d fucked the queen. Rip blew up. It was great, watching everyone else get into trouble for once.

                        I was good for once, left my gun and attitude… I did manage to steal a nice necklace though… Figure I’ll give it to Lisa next time I see her… It’s all sparkly like she likes.

 

                        Next stop is the 40s. I’ve got a bad feeling. Alexa bad. I think that freak with the hourglass knew what he was talking about when warned us to stay the hell away… Watch out for us… Okay?

                         

 

-Mick

 


	8. October 2016?

October… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Where the hell do I begin? This was just one shit storm. Guess I begin like I did for the Arrow dude and the new guy. With what the fuck happened in the forties.

                        We went to stop a nuclear bomb in New York City. So to do that, we kidnapped Albert Einstein. He’s actually an asshole. And we totally cockblocked him.

                        So we brought him to the Waverider. And found out that his wife is better than he is. So we went to save her. After finding out that Sara nearly got killed trying to kill Durk. Dark. Whatever the hell his name is.

                        There was a fight, but we couldn’t quite stop the whole thing. So Rip had the bright idea to send the ship right after the damn torpedo/nuke thing. I was put in stasis or some shit. And then I woke up to Arrow and this new guy.

                        So I told them our story. Most of it. Some of it. The basics really. Anyway, the new guy decided he’d stick around. He actually helped me find the others.

                        Haircut: With fucking dinosaurs. The dumbass actually poked a t-rex and didn’t think he’d die. Well… He didn’t die, but he did get close. And he looked bad. Like some sort of crazy man.

                        Sara: Was close to being hung. As a witch. Her crime? Corrupting the women. Basically she’s been fucking her way through all the women. Great.

                        Jax and Stein: Close to being beheaded while being ‘wizards’ in medieval England. Boy king got bored of them

                        Rip? We never found him… I hate not knowing where he is… What he’s doing.

                        Anyway… We did stop New York City from going boom. And I got to burn Nazis. So… Win-win. I guess.

                        That is until these people in spandex showed up and arrested us. Call themselves the JSA. Stupid really.

                        Had to save them from dying actually. We apparently fucked that up. Which meant that new boy disappeared. (Something about one of the hero men being his grandpa.)

                        So we went to Paris and went undercover. Stein can sing, we discovered. And Haircut can through a mean sucker punch.

                        We fixed it. More or less. And I got to burn more Nazis!

                         

 

-Mick

 


	9. October... 2016?

October… 2016?

            Dear Lenny,

                        NINAS EXIST!

                        Went to Feudal Japan because Haircut and Steel fell out of the ship. (Steel is new guy. He got powers. Like real powers. I’m almost jealous.)

                        Fought against this Shogun dude. And Ninjas! Ninjas tried to kill me. I stole one of their outfits. Can’t wait to show you…

                        And remember the JSA? Apparently their leader was murdered and this chick called Vixen thought I killed him, so she tried to kill me. But I think we’re on better terms now… She stole a ninja star for me… Think she likes me? Kinda hope not…

                        Don’t get me wrong, she’s smoking hot. Dark skin, dark eyes. Fighter. Feisty. Beautiful…

                        But she’s not… I miss ya Lenny…

                         

 

-Mick


	10. October 31, 2016

October 31, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        It’s Halloween. Or at least it felt like fucking Halloween. It was a living horror movie anyway.

                        So here’s the run down. We got a distress signal from a time pirate ship. Something about a virus he was carrying and he crashed. So we tracked him down. To Civil War times in Mississippi.

                        We benched Haircut. Someone needed to guard the ship in case the time pirate showed up… And he needed to get over losing the suit. Can’t have him moping while we’re in battle.

                        Okay. So we got there and no one is at the ship. It’s abandoned. So I got to do my thing and set it on fire. Next thing we know, zombies are chasing some poor black kid. That’s right. Zombies.

                        Professor tried to deny they existed, something about a fear he’s got. But they were zombies. No matter how hard we hit ‘em or cut into ‘em, they popped back up. We managed to beat them and retreat to the ship to ask Gideon what those zombies did to the timeline.

                        From here it gets fuzzy cuz I blacked out and woke up in the medbay. Haircut looked at me and saw I’d been bit. I told him he’d better find a damn cure, or he’d be first on my menu. He got to work, but I don’t think it did anything…

                        Next thing I know, I’m waking up again, on top of the Professor. I guess I was gonna try to bite him? I dunno. Poor man was scared though, surprised he didn’t have a heart attack.

                        Anyway, I went to recover. Asked Gideon about where you were… If it could find you. Still nothing. Can’t believe you won’t show up… It’s been months… I know you like to lay low and make a big entrance, but still… I miss ya. And we coulda used some of those zombie plans you made with Lisa back in the day… Honestly…

                        Also, don’t get angry… But I gave your gun to Haircut. He was down on himself and was trying to check on me and… I know how he felt… We would know how he felt. Being outcast and tossed aside because of what we couldn’t do instead of what we could do… And I need someone to help keep me running right… So I don’t get caught up again…

                        So I gave him your gun and told him if he did anything to fuck it up, I’d shave his hair and give him burns. Told him I’d teach him how to use it. Glad you taught me… For those just in case moments…

                        Damn I miss you. And I miss normal whiskey… The shit Gideon keeps…? It’s shit. And after all this… I need to drink...

 

-Mick


	11. November, 2016

November, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        I hate the 80s. We went and that Darkh guy was there. The one Sara wants to kill? And I was trying to teach Ray how to use the gun… To use your gun….

                        Let’s just say nothing went well and we almost died. Again.

                        Damn I miss you. You wouldn’t ask stupid questions or do something stupid to get us killed. I just… Damn…

                        I need more beer. Haircut froze all mine… And I’m not nearly drunk enough.

 

-Mick


	12. November 17, 2016

November 17, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        I actually know the date this time. It’s because we’re going back to 2016 soon… And I needed to know. Maybe I’ll run into Lisa… If I run into Flash, do you want me burn him, for old times’ sake? Hell, I’ll do it anyway if Sara ain’t around.

                        It’s been weird… These past few days. Weeks… Hours? I don’t even know. But it’s been weird. Ever since Haircut dismantled the… The cold gun to save the White House. (Speaking of, are you aware of who the hell they allowed into office this year? It’s bullshit. Criminals can run for office, yet we can’t vote. I’m thinking I should run in 2020. Watch the World Burn’ll be my slogan.)

                        Anyway, I been getting… Memories… Flashes… Of us… Growing up. Juvie. How you used to be this scrawny ass punk and then became this… Smart ass man.

                        We had to go back to the Old West, rode the horse you found last time. Can’t believe you named her after your mother. But hey, who am I to judge? My gun’s gotta name. Anyway, we had to save Hex, and that little town again. This time, thankfully, Haircut wasn’t sheriff.

                        I did get to gamble though. And drink. And play cards like you taught… Though I had Amaya, the Vixen chick, watching my every move. I still think she’s got a fire about her. I like it. But… I dunno… She’s somewhat cold and calculating, but she’s a little too quick to pull the triggers. I just… It feels okay but it doesn’t. Maybe I’m more confused than I thought.

                        The man we were after, the reason for our visit, actually thought I was trying to be friendly. I wasn’t. I don’t do friends. Hell, I only have you and Lisa… Maybe the team, but…

                        I still remember. Vividly. That they voted to let you take me out. That they let you leave me, even though they thought you were gonna kill me. I remember the kid gloves, the watchful looks, the leash I was kept on.

                        I almost got Steel killed because of it. Almost. I was so pissed. I hit that bag we stole, when we broke into that gym…? I think I broke it.

                        Amaya tried to talk to me. Touchy feeling kinda talk. I managed to get her to butt out.

                        Then Sara let me play with dynamite. Almost let myself go with it… I… It’s hard to focus on things anymore. Other than flames. You knew how to handle it best…

                        But Amaya snapped me out of it. Somehow. Went back to the ship. Professor’s acting weird and Haircut got some of that special energy rock stuff to make his new suit… And I… I went to our-my room. Played with the lighter you got me. The first one you snatched from that guard in juvie…

                        She came back. Apparently she doesn’t know when to back off. Offered to help ‘keep me in line’. Damn she makes me wanna drink. All of it makes me wanna drink.

                        Then Sara shows back up. Starts spouting off about 2016 and trouble and… I thinks she said ‘aliens’, but I’m not sure. I was half-drunk and focused on the flame.

                        Gideon still hasn’t pinged you yet. Says it may be a lost cause… That if I needed to see you, I should invest in a hologram or going back in time to find you. Or going to another world because apparently there are multiple Earths. Some kind of theory or something… I don’t know…

             Also… Did you know if the Flash moves fast enough he can travel in time? I didn’t. But apparently it can happen because another speedster did it. Yeah. That’s right. An evil speedster. And I thought Flash was annoying for butting into our fun. Now there’s one who wants to get the fun before us. ‘M not happy.

.

 

-Mick


	13. December 1, 2016

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an emotional letter... So if I really fucked up Mick's character, I'm sorry... This is also sort of my contribution to MICK RORY DESERVES BETTER squad stuff. Thank you.

December 1, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        How the hell do I even begin this clusterfuck of a story? I mean, seriously… It’s…. It’s straight outta one your sci-fi movies or your comic books…

                        We arrived in 2016. Low and behold, I got to ‘officially’ meet Flash’s friends and the Arrow. Glad to know all that time we were fighting a twink in a leather suit. Did you know he used to work for the badges? I sure as hell didn’t. Someone never mentioned it to me. And when I was Chronos, I had other things to think of.

            Oh… And remember that stunt we pulled back in 2010? Before our fiery ‘break-up’? When we sent Lisa in to embezzle that money from that rich family in Starling (Star, now) City? Well, apparently… That guy is the Green Arrow. The Robin Hood impersonator? Yeah… Thankfully, I don’t think he remember us much….

            There were others. Like that Ramon kid we kidnapped? He’s got powers now. Can see past and future events. And that doctor? Snow? Yeah, she’s got powers too. Like Elsa powers. (I know. You hated that movie, especially after Ramon gave you the name “Captain Cold”, but that’s the main thing I can think of right now.)

            Anyway, they brought in this chick from another world. Another earth. (Yes. Apparently that shit exists… As if our lives weren’t fucked up enough.) She’s cute. A cheerleader type. Makes me think of Haircut with that ‘eager to please’ attitude and always smiling. Blonde. Kinda tall.

            And guess what? She’s an alien. That’s right. A motherfucking alien. From somewhere called Krypton? Anyway, she’s apparently super strong, can fly, has heat vision (how cool is that?), and she has ice breath. And x-ray vision (wouldn’t that’ve been handy on some heists?).  The reason we had to meet her? We were about to be fighting aliens.

            Yep. Aliens exist. I just wish your little nerd heart could’ve been here for it. You would’ve been so happy…

            Anyway… Damn, I’m writing that a lot… We practiced fighting with ‘Supergirl’. (Yes. They called her that. Or Kara. I prefer ‘Skirt’.) Sara flirted with her. It was kinda sweet. Until the girl nearly killed us just by messing around.

            They nominated Flash as the leader. Clearly Sara or that Arrow guy would’ve been more appropriate. You would have been the best choice though. You and their nerd team. (Don’t think I don’t remember those plans you had for alien invasions back in Juvie. I remember them.)

            As expected, everything went to hell because we left without a plan, following the orders of the alien girl. We got brainwashed by these ugly looking things… Greyish. Tall. And damn their breath stunk. Like… Worse than that time Axel dared Mardon to try his new recipe… Yeah. That bad.

            When we came too… Flash and apparently his wannabe sidekick (some new speedster, where the hell do they come from?) and the Arrow saved us. And…

            I don’t like talking about feelings… But… Jax… Kinda hurt mine… Kinda. I mean, he was Firestorm at the time, so it could’ve been the Professor’s mind shining through… But it still hurt. The nerd girl that works with Arrow… Felicity? I call her Ponytail… Anyway… She asked me about being mind-controlled, something about her trying to fulfill her sci-fi list… And it was said that I don’t have a mind to control. By Jax. (Or the Professor with the Kid’s mouth.) It… Stung a bit.

            Wish you were there… To help me find the words to say…I’m not stupid, Lenny. Never been stupid… Just… An act. If people know you know things, they’ll assume you know too much… And that’s how you get killed. Remember when we learned that ‘lesson’ from your sperm donor? I do… I remember you nearly had a breakdown about it… I thought I’d have to visit you in Arkham or something… But Lisa and I got you to calm down… I’m still sorry… About that… It was my damn fault….

            Sorry… Tangent… Memory lane… Not pleasant.

            Back to my story: So we were going to head back to the meeting area. Some sort of hangar. Then the Star City troop, and Sara and Ray, were abducted. That’s right. Abducted. Flash and Skirt went to search the city while Felicity and her nerd patrol went to track them down with tech.

            Me? I went back to the Waverider to keep Amaya and Steel company. Jax and and the Professor went their respective ways. Professor wanted to build something with the science people and Jax wanted to help the heroes as a civilian. I dunno… It sounded good.

            So I went to the Waverider, wanted to relax… Got asked questions I didn’t wanna answer. Tried to call Lisa… But… I guess she still blames me… Yeah… I blame me too… Some days… Other days I blame you, you asshole.

            Waverider got the call to save the others. Apparently they were taken into space by the alien ship. Then we traveled back in time to kidnap an alien, only to be kidnapped ourselves by the government.

            At least I can sort of tell you what Area 51 is like… Sort of… From what I remember of the escape. (Ramon and Felicity saved us… Yeah… I know… Geeks rule. Whatever.) (Also… I think Ramon and Flash are having issues… They weren’t talking much… Ain’t they supposed to be buddy-buddy?)

            Anyway, we got back to the timeline and Flash was gonna turn himself over to the aliens. No one wanted him to do that… (Except me… I kinda blame him for you wanting to be a hero… But hey, I’ll get over it. I usually do.)

            So I pulled a Snart. I gave one of your… Winning speeches… Told him that even though I didn’t like him, you don’t leave a crew behind. (You should’ve remembered this. Asshole.) He seemed to appreciate the thought, aside from being referred to as a criminal…

            The invasion began, and I got to burn some aliens. Burned alien skin, by the way, smells. Horrible. Like worse than humans.

            The president threw us a party when it was over. (Never thought I’d write/say that. Also, Sara and I agreed, she was kinda hot… Like… Damn.)

            Supergirl went back to her Earth. She got a fancy new gadget so she can come visit. I teased her, told her to call me. Then I went back to the Waverider.

            Apparently, I was the only one there. Took that time to talk to Gideon… It thinks it may have found you… It’s not sure… But… There is a spark of you… Somewhere… And when I find you, I’m gonna punch you the face for leaving me with these assholes. And don’t say I could’ve left. Because I couldn’t. Not after you sacrificed yourself for them. That means… They were worth something… Right?

            Besides, I had to find you… And this is the only way since my ship was destroyed. I checked. I was thinking of a solo mission, but… I guess that was out. I’ll find you soon though. As soon as Gideon gets a good reading… I’ll find you. Even if I have to take control over Sara.

.                       You’re coming home, Lenny, one way or another.

 

-Mick

 


	14. December 9, 2016 (Part One)

December 9, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        Please leave me alone… I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I got you killed. I’m sorry you felt the need to die for us. I’m sorry.

                        I want to stop seeing you in such a state. Please stop with the words. Stop trying to get under my skin. Stop insulting my choices… You’re… you’re almost as bad as them.

                        I know they don’t want me. I know the reason they keep me is for muscle. Nothing more or less. They don’t care. I know that. But Lenny… I… I have to be here. I have to help find you.

                        Gideon… Lost your signal again. I… Dammit Len where are you? Stop… Stop torturing me. Stop popping up and then disappearing again. Please… Stay. Please just stay in one place until I can get you. Please.

                        Damn… I… I can’t do this. I can’t do this.

                        Maybe… Maybe I’m not a ‘Legend’. Not a Rogue. Not a Time Master or a bounty hunter. I… I’m nothing…

 

 

-Mick


	15. December 9, 2016 (Part Two)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was in a no internet area, so I couldn't post. So here's two letters from Mick to Len to make up for it. <3

December 9, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        I’m better now. Gideon… Helped calm down. We talked. No, we can’t find you yet. But the things I’m seeing… The ‘you’ I’m seeing, is something more like a Time Remnant instead of just a hallucination. You spent so much time on the ship that when you… Died or whatever the hell it is that happened to you at the Oculus happened, a piece of you is here… A small piece. But it’s here.

                        And Gideon promised to try and lay off the jokes. Won’t tell the team to because they don’t need to think of me as the ‘feeling’ sort… But Gideon promised to stop. And promised to alert me to you. Wherever you are.

                        I checked in on Lisa. She’s staying in Gotham now with some of her friends. Selina, Pamela, and Harley. You remember them, right? They’re kinda wacky, but all of those guys in Gotham are. Hell, a guy in a leather batsuit is their hero. (Of course, we got the twink in red leather. But at least he’s got superpowers.)

                        Anyway, here’s the rundown of what happened this time. We went to 1927. Chicago. During Prohibition and Al Capone. That’s right, we ran with gangsters. Well… We stopped some gangsters. Al Capone to be exact. (I know… I know… It’s weird. But I got to shoot a tommy gun and call myself Clyde. Vixen, who ain’t so bad for someone from the 40s was my Bonnie. Don’t worry though, she won’t replace you. Ever.)

                        And we fought Darkh and some guy called Malcolm and another speedster. That’s right. A speedster. An evil one. It made me glad Red is one of the good guys, otherwise, we’d have a run (your puns are contagious) for our money.

                        Sara gave back this amulet thing because they were gonna kill the Professor. Can’t let that happen. His daughter’d kill us. (Yeah, he apparently got busy with Mrs. Professor after talking to his younger self. Can we say ‘uh oh?’) But we saved him.

                        And Vixen let out her wild side. She played villain pretty well. Even stole me some liquor from Capone’s speakeasy. (Again. She won’t replace you. It’s just… Nice to have someone to scratch that itch. You know? I mean, she just lost her boyfriend and I lost you not long ago… So… We’re kinda… Using each other. Nothing real though. Except maybe… I’ll call her a friend? Or something? Something.)

                        I got to watch Haircut and Steel fight and argue like two-year-olds. They’re worse than you and Lisa were when we got together to rob that museum in Metropolis. Couldn’t decide whether or not to fight each other or be proud.

                        Gotta go. Sara’s buzzing. I think we finally found Rip… That’s… Good… I think.

                        And Lenny… Please… Please stay in one place. I can’t find you if you keep jumping around. So try and focus all your Time Remnant selves in one place. I’ll find you. I swear. If I never do anything else for you, I’ll do that.

 

 

-Mick


	16. December 25, 2016

December 25, 2016

            Dear Lenny,

                        It’s hard… I hate this… I… It’s Christmas… The first Christmas without you. I don’t know where Lisa is spending her own Christmas… But I know where I’m spending mine… On the Waverider. Where I’m pretty sure I’m not welcome here. Not really…

                        I keep looking… At your bed, at your side of the room… Damnit I miss you. I miss the puns you make around this time of year. I miss the cocoa and mini marshmellows. I miss the cheesy movies you loved…

                        Actually watched a few of them… _It’s A Wonderful Life_ and those cartoon ones you and Lisa watched when we were younger. When Lisa was a kid… I just… Damn…

                        Why? Why’d you have to leave?

                        The others have dressed the Waverider up for the season. Haircut and Steel mostly… Amaya ain’t into the holiday. Celebrates something else. And Haircut is Jewish, like the Professor, but they enjoy the decoration and the movies. The food.

                        I like the food… I may have anonymously made some of my famous turkey stuffing… They may not deserve it… but… Something had to happen I suppose…

                        Sara’s missing her sister, Amaya her boyfriend. And Ray is still pining for the bird girl… And that leaves me missing you…

                        I wish we could find you. Gideon says you’re out there somewhere… That you have a blip. I wish you’d give a better sign. What are you waiting on? A grand entrance?

                        Just… Damnit Lenny let me find you. That’s all I want for Christmas. To find you. Alive and safe. I promise I won’t even hit you. (Hard.)

                        Please…

 

 

-Mick


	17. January 16, 2017

January 16, 2017

            Dear Lenny,

                        Haven’t wrote in a while… Been busy. Keep seeing you. Some days. Others, not so much.

                        Gideon let us know when it was 2017… Strange to think, starting a new year without ya. Had a few drinks in your honor…

                        We’ve been trying to hunt down Hunter. He’s MIA, been MIA for a while now… Had to focus all efforts to find him.

                        We may have a lead though… Nothing major. Steel and Haircut are starting to get on my damn nerves though. And Sara’s nerves too. Every time those two start trying to ‘spar’ someone gets hurt or something on the ship gets damaged.

                        Amateurs is what they are. Trying to ‘out hero’ each other. Good thing we never recruited the Flash for this shit, or we’d have three idiots pulling stunts.

                        Speaking of stunts, the kid and the professor have been going at it. Not in the fun way, mind you, but in the ‘I’m sick and tired of you’. Think it’s because they haven’t formed Firestorm in a little while… Can’t be a fiery man/thing on a ship…

                        Had Gideon change that scenery thing in our room (yes, it’s still OUR room, your shit’s just where you left it, even managed to get the cold gun back from Haircut, which Cisco fixed back in 2016… Said he… Felt bad I lost you. Asked about your sister. I think something might be starting there…)

                        Anyway, the scenery’s been changed to a volcano. I’m hoping it’ll piss you off enough, wherever you are in the universe, that you’ll come back and demand I change it back to that mountain side… If it works, you’ll be home…

                        Hell, we don’t really have a home do we? Buncha safe houses… The ship… And we’ve got those reserved cells back in Iron Heights…

                        Tell ya what, you come back from the dead like fucking immortal you’re supposed to be, and I’ll fix up my grandparents’ old farm. We can make extra rooms for the rest of the Rogues. Never have to travel through time again. And, it’s in a remote enough location to stash loot and plan heists…

                        Hell, anyone who finds this shit and reads it it’ll think I’m delusional… I’d think I’m delusional, if I didn’t know about Sara’s dates with death or how the birds kept reincarnating, or about how the Flash can fuck with timelines about as well as we can… So I’m holding out hope…

                        Hope… I know. It’s not a word I’d used before… Not really. That was your thing, whether you admit it or not… Guess you rubbed off on me… Or Haircut did when he first attached to me like some sort of research project…

                        I’m going to find you Lenny… Somehow… And when I do… I’m gonna tell you… Tell you everything you missed, everything I shoulda said… Things I need to say… (After I bust your skull for leaving me and Lisa that is…)

                        You’d better not even think you’re dead for real… If I have to… use a… What are they called? That pit that brought Sara back? Anyway, if I have to use one of those, I’ll do it… I know the others’ll claim it’s a bad idea, that you’ll be different from when you first go in, but I won’t care. (Hell, I could go back in time and trick Lewis into doing it, then you can kill him and get over your blood lust… That’s how it goes… Right?)

                        Come home, Len…

 

 

-Mick


	18. Jan. 2017?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically I'm having feels after this episode, so Mick is... Drunk and emotional and fuck it I'm trying not to cry myself.

January, 2017?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Stop it. Just stop it! I’m tired of seeing you everywhere! Of hearing you! I… I’m tired of you mocking me… That I can’t find you. I know I can. I know I can. Dammit Lenny I know I can do this….

 

 

-Mick


	19. Jan. 2017

January, 2017?

            Dear Lenny,

                        I’m calm. Now. Professor said he’d help me. Well… Doctor Stein said he’d help me. He’s gonna play therapist and I’m gonna tell him shit… See how that goes.

 

 

-Mick


	20. January 2017?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this by the way. I know it's not the best... But it's something. (And I do have legitimate plot points... I'm just currently waiting to see how much canon I'm going to have to turn into an AU.(

January, 2017?

            Dear Lenny,

                        Okay… Let’s see if I can tell this shit hole of a story. So Stein was playing doctor with me… Not in the fun way… But in the oddly helpful way. Man thought I was having feelings about you… Something about unsaid love or some shit… About grief and whatever. But we don’t have hearts. We don’t do touchy-feely. We weren’t ‘lovers’ just ‘when it’s convenient and we’re horny fuckers’… At least… It’s what we agreed. That way no jealousy… (Not even to that twink, Red. Or to Haircut.)

                        Anyway, he was under the impression that my seeing you, dead/ghost/hallucination you, is that I’m under stress and grief. I call bullshit, honestly. Just because I miss a warm body in my bed and those smartass remarks, don’t mean I’m grieving… Not… Not really. Because you don’t grieve if someone is still alive. And dammit Gideon says you’re out there! Gideon’s a computer, it can’t lie. (Mine never did anyway… But he was much better trained…)

                        So then George Lucas, yes, your most favorite director and creator of your favorite movies (nerd), fucked up. Because of our team and this group called the Legion of Doom. (It’s a stupid name. But it stuck. Damn Steel.)

                        Yeah. He saw the Doom guys and our group coming and was like ‘fuck this shit, I’m going home’. So he left film school. Which caused Haircut and Steel to lose memories and become virtually useless… (Like me? Like I am now that I’m trying to be a hero? It’s what ghost you keeps saying…)

                        Amaya went to fix it. Sara found Rip. And apparently the Time Bastards put in a satellite in my brain. (Finding that out brought back some painful memories… Betrayal. Torture. Like worse than the Santini’s torture… Probably worse than what Sara did as an assassin… But… We knocked sense into each other… Didn’t we…?)

                        Good news, satellite wasn’t sending me signals, not even of you. Unfortunately, Stein still thinks I’m ‘grieving’. Need a drink more than anything.

                        We lost Rip to the Doom guys. So now we’re after him. (We got the Spear of Destiny though… A piece of it anyway… Wish you were here, could figure out how the hell to sell it on the black market. I’m sure the magical hocus-pocus-people would love it… Or those who are highly religious…)

                        Speaking of religion, I checked on your sister… She’s apparently attempting to become a Catholic nun. (For a con of course. She’s running her own crew. A group of ‘sirens’. It’s her, Selina, Ivy, and that Harley chick. Yeah, that Harley. But she left the clown… So she’s… More stable… Sort of…)

                        By the way, you better not be really fucking dead. I better not be wasting all my time and energy on this damn ship to find you and you actually be dead. Or I’m gonna find a way to kill you myself. Understood?

 

 

-Mick


	21. January 2017?

January, 2017?

            Dear Lenny,

                        So we went back to 2017, Central City. Had to find someone that could figure out the relic/amulet thingy that Sara stole from the speedster. While the Professor and the kid went to deal with finding that person, and the others went to STAR Labs to mess with Flash and pick his brain, I went to one of our old haunts.

                        Mardon was there. Kinda nice seeing a familiar face. He asked about you, if it was true what Lisa said… He actually looked like he missed you. Even if you did turn down killing the Flash with him. But he understood. Working with Trickster Senior is stupid. Even he knows that.

                        Also, your old buddy Scudder is in Iron Heights, along with his chickadee Roza. Rosa. Rosie? Anyway, they’re both there. And have powers. He can go through mirrors and she can make people sick. Vertigo or something. Maybe we can get them to join up… When they break themselves out. (You know they will. I mean, come on.)

                        Anyway, back to the damn ship. Stein brought his daughter. The one who’s an aboration. Abhoration. Anyway, he brought her. She figured out the system of the amulet and Gideon. She’s pretty. In a dorky way. Much like that doctor we kidnapped a few years ago.

                        I may have spilled the beans to her, about being not real. But I was trying to return a favor… He tried to help me face you, so I tried to help him face her.

                        And we discovered who the evil speedster we’re up against is. Eobard Thawne. You remember that cop, Ed? The one who tried to give us a ‘talking to’. Yeah, apparently he spawned an evil speedster somewhere down his family line. And the guy is speeding away from his death. So… That’s why he wants the Spear Of Destiny. So we’re trying to figure out how to catch him.

                        So that’s where we’re at now. Trying to figure this shit out. Professor’s daughter is back where she belongs, in Central. (I think the kid has a slight crush. He wanted to follow her around.)

                        Stein is also not as nice as he claims. He stole my damn brandy. The good shit I rightfully stole in Central. Asshole.

                        (I miss you Len. The team started those ‘stupid’ jokes again. Hell, you never did that. You called me out when I made a bad plan, sure, but you never made me feel less about it. Damn ‘heroes’. Why’d you have to die?)

                        I’m still trying to ping you. Gave Gideon a few more options to choose from, to find you. So far, nothing. (If I get hot chocolate and mini marshmallows, will you appear? Should I do a summoning like they do on that show Lisa likes? With the magic and the demons? Because I will. I’ll get the cold gun Cisco gave back to me, I’ll get mini marshmallow hot chocolate, peanut M&M’s, that damn parka, your motorcycle helmet, and the ring. I will summon you.)

 

 

-Mick


	22. Second Christmas

Second Christmas

            Dear Lenny,

                        We went back to the American Revolution today. The Legion of Doom (thanks, Steel) summoned us by killing George Washington. Can’t have that happen. And Palmer was giving me hell about my choices and my lifestyle. Apparently I caused a rat to appear. (Is it you in rat form? Like that lady who could become a cat in Harry Potter?)

                        Anyway, we went to save Georgie-Boy and got captured. By Rip. Always hated that man. Even more than the others when they make fun. (Idiots. All of them. They’ll burn as soon as I find you… Except maybe Amaya and Haircut… Maybe.)

                        Sara got shot, Steel and Amaya got her back to the ship. Haircut was trapped as a tiny action figure. And I was escorted to a death camp with George. He was all about honor and spewing bullshit about being treated fairly despite being a prisoner. Boy was he shocked when the other British guy, Cornwus or whatever, said he was gonna be hung for treason.

                        So while in our prison tent, we had a little heart-to-heart. Meaning I told him what true Americans are like (based on what we watched on the History channel, remember? That week were trapped hiding from the heat in San Francisco?). I told him we are underhanded, sneak attack using, ambush making kinda people. That we don’t give up and give in. That we’re basically cockroaches, we won’t die just because you don’t like us.

                        So we plotted. He’d act like he was gonna go down peacefully, and I’d attack the group. It worked too. You shoulda seen the looks on those British losers’ faces. It was amazing. And Steel and Amaya showed up to help. (Messed up looking too. Musta got busy, but that’s none of my business.)

                        Escorted Georgie to his home. And he gave me a hug. And told me I was the best America had to offer. Me. Hell if he only knew… Am I right?

                        When we got back on the ship, it was chaos. Sara had almost died. Again. And Palmer fought with the rat. And Rip broke into the ship, getting away with our Spear of Destiny that we stole fair and square. Asshole. (And Sara didn’t let the kid kill him. Idiot. Should’ve made him a captive until I got back. Then I’d’ve killed him myself. Over and over. Like I wanted to do as Chronos. Like I’ve been wanting to do since he said I had the IQ of meat. Asshole.)

                        Anyway, timeline was restored, and now there’s a statue in my likeness in Washington, D.C.. No joking. It’s me. I’m a Founding Father. People learn about me in history books. How wild is that? (Starting to get memories of the cops asking me about my great-great-great-great grandfather, how I fell so far. Eh. Can’t win ‘em all huh?)

                        So we had a second Christmas. To celebrate being alive and mostly well. Wore a crown. Sassed at Palmer. (That rat he fought? He made sure it wasn’t carrying any diseases and gave it to me. Fixed it a cage and everything. I always wanted a pet, but you always said a safe house life wasn’t a life for a cat or dog. I named it after you. Best little sneak I know. Just like this little rat. Kinda looks like you. Salt and pepper colored. Bright eyes. Only occasionally affectionate.)

                        Not sure where we’re headed next… So… I’m going to lay this to rest for now. Gotta feed Little Lenny. He likes the same chips you do. (Did you transform into a rat?)

 

 

 

-Mick


	23. February 2017?

February 2017

            Dear Lenny,

                        Little Lenny is pretty awesome. Kinda clingy… Likes to crawl all over me and nips at me when I don’t do what he wants. Stays relatively clean.

                        But that’s not what this letter should be about… Is it? We went to Camelot. Yeah. Camelot. That place that isn’t supposed to exist, but it does. Sorta… A little island off the coast of Europe was turned into Camelot by a piece of that Spear.

                        Shit. I’m getting ahead of myself… We went to the future first and foremost. And Professor actually stole from it. (I mean, the man was dead, wouldn’t miss it… But yeah… He stole. I feel so proud.)

                        And that was when we went to Camelot. I decided against it. Though Haircut was all gungho about it. Figures, with his hero complex. Little Lenny needed my attention more… Taught him a few tricks… (Like how to sneak food to me.)

                        Rip is still working with the Legion. (Ass. Why didn’t Sara let the Kid kill him?) And he mind-controlled a lot of the soldiers. But I got to save the day by overriding the mind control technology. (I made the professor blow a gasket at that. Ass thought he could a better job. But he wasn’t intense enough or something.)

                        We captured Rip. He’s in the brig. Kid talked to him. I don’t think I like him being here… I’m getting that feel of Alexa… You know? And Little Lenny’s skitting about in his cage. I think he knows too. (Animals know things…)

                        Gideon says I need to stop looking for you… I don’t know if I can… Says it’s… A waste of time. (Okay not quite like that. But it is a waste of resources that are needed to find the other piece of the spear and figuring out how to stop the Legion.)

                        Why aren’t you revealing yourself? What are you hiding from? The Time Bastards can’t hurt you. Lewis is dead. Lisa… Lisa misses you. And Red misses you. (Even if you were a pain in his ass.)

                        I miss you Lenny… Miss the puns. The crazy ideas that seem to work. The planning of heists months in advance with plans all the way to H made out. That little scar near your lip from our time in juvie. I… I don’t know... Len come on. This isn’t… This isn’t okay anymore…

 

 

 

 

-Mick

 


	24. March 2017?

March,  2017

            Dear Lenny,

                        Well… Got to earn my keep today. I told you having Rip on Waverider now that’s he an asshole workin’ with the Legion. He got out, overrode Gideon. (Who was already a bit pissed because of Steel.) Anyway, I went after him, got punch him in his English face.

                        I had him back in the brig, but Gideon went out control and we crashed landed back in Prehistoric Times. Sara sent out Haircut, Amaya, and Steel to find something or whatever for the Waverider. To fix it.

                        I wanted to go to Jurassic Park, but Blondie wanted me to interrogate Rip. Said if anyone could do it, it was me. Didn’t know how to take that. Like, was it because I’m scary or because I’ve got a record a mile and half long?

                        Caused me to bring up some things… Like the Time Bastards… What they did to me. We did it to Rip, and technically Sara and Jax… Sent them into Rip’s mind, hoping to get our information…

                        Which left me and the Professor who was pacing and having a dying fit. Wanted to know what else they did to me, how horrible it had to have been, so very concerned. It would’ve been nice if it wasn’t that he knew this earlier, back when you did, and then continued to treat me like crap. But I’m not bitter, just kept my mouth shut and drank, like I’m good at doing.

                        Little Lenny scampered in and crawled up my legs, let me pet him. Guess he could sense the distress…

                        Then something must’ve happened to the kid while he was under because Professor was acting funny… I had to give him a pep talk of sorts. That Jax wasn’t just a kid, that he had to grow up… That he wouldn’t be there to protect the kid forever… He tried to talk about you, but I just went to get more beer… Little Lenny wanted to bite him, but I stopped the rat. He’s protective of me… Makes me think of you, especially back when you were scrawny and small….

                        Anyway, they saved Rip, made him the captain again. We got to leave Jurassic Park. Next up, is NASA.

 

 

                        I’m starting to think there’s no hope for us Lenny… That you… You’re lost. To time. To me. That you’re never coming back. I’m thinking about stopping the letters. Not like you’re ever going to write me back. Or show up. Or at least, it’s looking more and more unlikely that you’re coming back.

                        Maybe you are better off… Wherever you are… (Is there life after death? I know someone said the Devil has a nightclub back in Los Angeles, but it’s just a story…)

 

 

 

 

-Mick


	25. March 2017?

March,  2017

            Dear Lenny,

                        Well, I got to dress up as a nerd today. We went back in time to the space launch days and the Professor, Kid, and I went undercover as nerds. You would’ve liked my suit… Actually, now that I think about it, that suit would’ve been destroyed by you…

                        Anyway, Haircut wen to the moon, we almost saw him die. Thankfully he’s alive.

                        Rip met Little Lenny… He hates him, but I love him, he’s a sweet heart… I always liked animals more than people. And I told Rip I’d kill him if he did anything to my rat. That worked pretty well…

                        The Professor can sing by the way. He sang in front of mission control at NASA. It was something… Interesting. (Never asking him to do distractions again though…)

                        Steel lost his grandpa today. And his girl… Sorta… It’s been a weird trip.

                        Haircut was okay. Made semi-friends with that evil speedster… Said the speed force is going to kill him… That’s going to be a trip… When that happens. (Bad guys never win forever… Even we did a few stints… Nothing that warranted the death penalty yet… Yet…)

                        Anyway… We’re going to be off again soon. Just wanted to write something quick.

 

 

 

 

-Mick


	26. March 2017?

March,  2017

            Dear Lenny,

                        Don’t think much has changed… Except it has. I… We got the last piece of the spear. But to get it… We had to go to the Vanishing Point. The place where you died. Where… You sent me away with the ring… (And kissed Blondie, but I don’t hold grudges… Well… Many grudges… Okay so I got my payback during training one day…)

                        Then the spear was whole again. And everyone immediately thought I was gonna use it to bring you back… Which… Honestly… I probably would… But… I’d like to be better… Some days…

                        And then it went to hell.

                        Went to one of the World Wars. And saw you… And you… Berated me. You made see things I already see. The team doesn’t care. Never did. I was your lapdog. But you… You at least treated me as an equal. And I told you what happened, what we were planning. Because you’re in my damn head… Right? Right?

                        And then… And then we made it back. And I really wanted to use the spear before we destroyed it. I wanted you back so badly… The Professor showed up… And… Started berating me his own way. I wanted to kill him. I’ve wanted to kill him every time he insulted me. Just ‘cuz I don’t have my GED or awards or a… A degree, everyone thinks I’m an idiot. He thinks I’m an idiot.

                        You didn’t though. You knew I snuck into chemistry classes and learned everything I could on fire and weapons and explosives… You knew I knew my art. (Enough to get it sold for the highest price anyway…) Why… Why can’t anyone else see it? I figured Blondie would at least… She stuck up for me before… Before you died… But after…? She did that for you though. I bet. She just wanted… You. Dammit she just wanted you to like her. Bitch.

                        Then we went to fucking… We went to a church to find the blood of Christ. Or the supposed blood of Christ. I don’t know. I was never a good Catholic. We know this. Hell, you were a terrible… Can I say Jew? I knew you did, but is it wrong for me to do so? I don’t know anymore…

                        But you showed up. You showed up and… You were real but it was a past you and… Dammit I missed you, you idiot. You offered for me to come back… I should’ve too. Since I got hell when I came back to the ship.

                        “You told him?” “Is it going to be him or us?” “Criminal!” I heard it all. Even from Blondie. From the TRAINED KILLER. And Stein knew! Stein knew I wasn’t all there! That I’d been seeing you! That… That I thought you weren’t real… Dammit I always screw up.

                        I screwed up and got burned back in 2012. Made you even threaten to leave. Forever. Have burns forever now… More or less. (Time Bastards, Gideon.)

                        I… Burned my family down. Hell, I can still hear their screams. And I didn’t hate them… Except maybe my dad… But… My brothers… My sister… My mom… I should’ve gotten them out at least… But I didn’t. My stupid self got caught up in the flames. In way it danced.

                        Fuck me right? I guess… One good thing came from it… Met you in juvie because of it… Scrawny punk-ass kid with a big mouth… And I screwed that up. Multiple times. The fire of 2012. The Flash. The future place we were at with my chalice. The pirates. The Time Bastards. Letting you take my place at the Oculus… 

                        It really should’ve been me… I should’ve blown. I didn’t have anyone but you. No family. No sister. No Blondie. (I know what you’re gonna say, she was just one of the new things you wanted to play with, meant nothing, because you always came back to me… But still…) I… I have me… And a rat. Little Lenny…

                        Little Lenny is trying to make feel better. He’s nuzzling me before we go out… But… It’s… It’s not helping as much… I mean… I guess he is cute…I may take him with me. For a good luck charm… Maybe…

                        Gotta go… Captain’s calling. (Damn I’m not near drunk enough for any of this bullshit.)

 

 

 

-Mick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's saying "Fuck you canon?" Me. That's who. This will also be the last 'journal/letter' entry. Next chapter will be out of Mick's point of view. It will be from the team following Mick's "betrayal". And then it will pick up with Mick and real Len talking and getting back on track. Even if it is with the evil threesome that is Damien Darkh, Malcolm Merlyn, and Eobard Thawne.


	27. The Betrayal

            The Betrayal

               

                        Nate walked into the main room as the others argued over Mick’s apparent betrayal, his choosing Leonard Snart (who was supposed to be dead) over the team. “Did we really trust him though? I mean… He picked up on it… How we felt…” Ray spoke up. Nate dropped the box he’d been carrying.

                        “He did. He’s been pissed at us a long time. Been needing some mental health care too, but we were too busy to notice. Read these… It… Explains a lot. About Mick. His feelings this trip…” Nate said. Sara went to the box, picking up the papers and looking them over.

                        “What are they?” Dr. Stein asked. Sara paled, her face saddening.

                        “Letters… To Leonard… About what happened after he died…” She softened. “Were we really… This bad?”

                        “What do you mean?” Jax asked.

                        “Calling him names. Picking on him for his intelligence… I mean… How could we? And call ourselves legends…?”

                        “Mr. Rory was never the brains, Ms. Lance. I don’t know why-”

                        “It caused him to make the choice that he made, Stein. And I don’t know why you didn’t tell us about his issues sooner, seeing as how you knew about them.”

                        “So… He was really… He really thought Snart was a hallucination?” Jax asked. Sara nodded. “So he’s seen it before?”

                        “He… Did… That was why he wanted me to… Try brain surgery on him… We thought somehow the Time Masters were still showing him images of Leonard… Messing with him… But when that didn’t pan out, I chalked it up to his grief… Though… I suppose I should have been nicer… About things…”

                        “OF COURSE WE SHOULD HAVE!” Ray swore, looking more and more distraught. Pissed. “He… We made fun of his intellect without once thinking of everything he’s been through. The Time Masters, for instance. He was a bounty hunter, a skilled pilot of his own ship, and yet we treated him as if he knew nothing about Gideon. He was a successful bounty hunter, and we treated him as if he didn’t have good plans or make good points.” Ray slumped against the wall.

                        “We did this to him. We made him turn. We are the reason that Snart’s words changed him. Hell… It was Rip’s words last time that made him betray us to the time pirates. Isn’t that right Jax?” Ray asked. The younger man had admitted a while back about Rip’s remarks to Mick, how guilty he’d felt.

                        All eyes were now on Rip, who seemed shrink. “I… May have said he had the IQ of meat… That the only reason I recruited him was because I knew he and Mr. Snart were a package deal…” WHUMP. Sara hit him.

                        “Now don’t hit him Sara. You’re just as guilty. What was it you said to him when he was talking to Supergirl? Or about any of his plans? I mean seriously… You belittled him like that, and you’re the damn assassin. In league with the League of Assassins. Yeah, you’re definitely one to make judgments.” Ray quipped. They looked at Ray now, concerned.

                        “I know I was no angel to him. I wanted to be his partner, tried to be like Snart, but he tried to explain to me that he wanted me to be me. Tried to teach me the ways of the cold gun. Tried to help me be a badass version of myself. And you know what? I let him down. I pulled away from him to be closer to Nate and Amaya, because they got my jokes, or at least reacted to them.” Ray felt tears fall now. “And maybe, maybe if I had been a better person, if I’d been a better friend to Mick, we wouldn’t be in this mess right now. Hell, maybe Snart and Mick would be with us if I’d been a better friend. If we’d all been better friends.” He stood, making his way to his room.

                        The main room became quiet as the others looked at Mick’s letters, each one becoming more and more distraught. “Gideon… Did he really…?”

                        “Try looking for Mr. Snart? Yes. In fact it was his main reason for staying on the ship… though, we never were able to locate him.” Sara nodded slowly.

                        “So what now, Captain?” Amaya asked.

                        “We try to stop the Legion. And we try to get our friend back… Maybe… If we apologize… If we try to show we’re better… Mick’ll come back to us. Will come to his senses…”


	28. The Reunion

The Reunion

               

                        Mick felt sick after the speedster, Eobard Thawne was the name, stopped at the Vanishing Point.

                        The Vanishing Point. The one place where he used to feel sick anyway. But then he saw that shit-eating grin he knew all too well. Leonard Snart. Len was back. Alive. “I’ll let you two talk while we await Malcolm Merlyn. I know you both have some catching up to do…” Thawne spoke, walking away.

                        Mick looked at Len, deciding his first question fairly quickly. “When did they get you from?” Snart shrugged.

                        “Right when Rip showed up… Well…. A little after. When I went out for groceries while you went to work on that motorcycle… Before they said we left with those… Heroes…” Snart snorted at the name. Mick took a breath.

                        “So you don’t know anything that happened after? About what happened on the Waverider?”

                        “I know those assholes weren’t treating you the way you deserved. And you let them. Why? Didja think you deserved it?” Len spat, walking over. “How badly did they let you sink? And don’t lie. I can see the bags under your eyes. You’ve not been sleeping. Been thinking of those fires, haven’t you? Damn heroes. Don’t deserve the title.” Len snarled, handing Mick a new lighter. Shiny new.

                        “It… I played with dynamite… Almost let myself… join you…” A smack, not too hard, just hard enough to feel.

                        “Don’t. Ever. Think. Of. That. You are far more important than…” Len took a breath. “No matter. I did what I wanted. Got what I wanted. We’re done now.”

                        Mick gave a confused look. “What do you mean? The spear… Ain’t we gonna…?”

                        “We can use it if you want… But I was thinking of having Thawne send us back. To 2017. I mean, not like the Timeline’ll change too badly. I’m already supposed to be dead, I’m from that time before I died. Shouldn’t be too bad of a change. And once we’re back, I’ll set up a nice bonfire for you. And we can call Lisa and the others and have a barbecue.” He gave that grin again.

                        “And we can plan our next heist. Flash won’t be expecting it, he thinks I’m dead. So it’ll be a… Back from the dead kind of heist.” Mick tilted his head. Man did that sound wonderful. Beautiful. But…

                        “Lenny… I wanted to… Stop… To change… I don’t wanna be drawn to fire anymore…” He looked down, that shame showing up. The shame he had when Amaya stopped him from going up in smoke with the dynamite, when the police first showed up after his family’s deaths. “I want to be better…”

                        “Mick. You don’t need to change unless it’s something you actually want to do. I think you’re fine the way you are. And so did Lisa.” He frowned. “Why the sudden interest in changing anyway? Those idiots on the Waverider? They get to you?” He made a displeased noise. “I’ll definitely freeze them all if I ever see them again.” Mick gave a small smile.

                        “I… I think I’m ready to go home. I’m tired of magic and time travel. It’s too much sci-fi and fantasy for me.” Len grinned.

                        “I’ll let Eobard know… He owes me after all.” Mick thought for a moment and stopped Len when he felt his pocket moving.

                        “Wait. Something you should know… I kinda have a pet now…” Len raised an eyebrow.

                        “A pet…?”

                        “He’s a rat, named him after you… Guess I really missed you, when you were dead… But he’s smart. And kinda cute…” Mick reached down and picked up Little Lenny, showing him to human Len. Len gave a look, gazing at the creature.

                        “I suppose we can keep him… Since he’s been good to you… But he’s going to have to take up thievery and sneaking. Can’t have it be useless.” Len scrunched up his nose. “Got it?”

                        “Got it.” Mick grinned. He felt lighter. Happier. Alive.

                        Len lead him down to Eobard and Darkh. “We’re ready to go.”

                        “Go… You don’t want to change anything?” Darkh asked, confused. Len and Mick shrugged.

                        “We just want to get home. Things to steal, people to piss off. You know how it is.” Len answered. Eobard nodded.

                        “I thank you both for assisting. Hope your lives are easier now. I’ll give you the money promised and you two can go wherever your hearts’ desire.”

                        “Central City 2017 is good enough right now, thanks. Preferably near our last safe house.” Len drawled. Mick stood, waiting. Eobard began to speed up. There was that nausea again, that only speedsters could invoke…

 


	29. Home

Home

               

                        Things slowed down, scenery coming into place. A warehouse near the docks. Their last safe house. And a large pile of cash. And Leonard. “Glad at least one speedster can follow directions. Don’t know how Scarlet’s still alive with all the bullshit he pulls.” The other man drawled. Mick nodded, trying to grasp that this was real.

                        It was real. It was real. Len was alive and they were off that damn ship. Len looked at Mick, concern etching into his face. “Mick. Are you okay?”

                        “’M fine. You’re alive. Got Little Lenny. Got the cash. It’s fine. It’s… its real now.” Mick answered, eyes never leaving the other man. Little Lenny, LL, came out of Mick’s pocket after his name had been spoken, wanting to see what was going on. Len gave Mick another once over.

                        “I don’t think you’re fine. I think you need rest. And relaxation. Something to steal or burn or both.” Len walked over, closer, within arm’s reach. “I think those damned heroes need to learn how to better take care of their team.” He frowned. “I don’t think I like what they did to you.”

                        “Didn’t do nothing to me. I’m fine. Maybe not as ruthless or mindless-” Mick started, when Len hit him. Not hard, but hard enough to stop his sentence, for LL to climb to his shoulder and try to nuzzle, making sure he was fine.

                        “You were never just ruthless and mindless Mick.” Len growled. Scathing. That sort of anger Mick had only seen when Lewis or Scudder were being referred to. “I should’ve iced them all. I can’t believe… And they let…” He shook his head, trying to regain his composure. Mick had seen it before. The tilt of the head, the eyes closed, the mumbled counting of numbers.

                        “Don’t worry Mick. I’m going to make sure you’re taken care of. That you get to feeling better.” Len took Mick’s hand, something rare in and of itself, and led the other man into the safe house.

                        “The cash…”

                        “I’ll bring it in soon. After you and the rat get comfy. No one around here for miles. I promise.”

\------Legends-------

 

                        Two weeks and he was already feeling better. Like himself. Len was planning a heist, his big reveal for the Flash that he was still alive and well. Lisa had taken up residence in the guest room, though she seemed attached to her brother’s hip, much like when she was kid. Mick couldn’t blame her, he was the same way. Never wanted to leave the bed again, not with Len there. Not with Len letting him hold tightly to his body, letting him kiss him and reaffirm he was alive.

                        But of course, there were times he had to leave. Len had gotten him back into therapy, something about him being in a depressive episode thanks to those ‘fucking idiots who wouldn’t know mental illness if it bit them in the ass’ (Len’s new name for the Legends). And LL came with him, proof of having a therapy animal. Even managed to get him certified. (The rat seemed excited about it, knowing exactly what was expected of him.)

                        “So, when are we pulling this off?”

                        “In due time, Mick. I’ve had to do more extensive research than normal. Been dead a year, remember?” Len snorted, looking over the blueprints. Mick groaned, wrapping an arm around Len.

                        “Trust me. I know. I just… Wanna burn something… And Red’s suit looks pretty on fire.” He noticed Len’s eyes flash. A hint of jealousy. Ha. Served him right.

                        “Wanna burn something, Mick? How about we start a bon fire? You and me? Lisa may not like it, but I’ll send her for marshmallows and we can make s’mores. Like old times. And then we’ll go to bed nice and smoky and warm. Like you like it.”

                        Mick grinned. It was a wonderful idea. A great idea. But… “You hate the smell of smoke.”  
                        “So we’ll shower somewhere in that time. Point is, I need to make it up to you for dying and leaving you with those assholes.” Len turned to face him. “And maybe… I missed the smell of smoke… Coming from you of course. That makes the smell a little more bearable.” Mick smirked.

                        “Can’t just admit to missing me, can ya Boss?”

                        “Oh. I missed you. I just didn’t want you to get a big head from knowing.” Len closed the distance, kissing him. “Damn I missed you. Like I said though. I’m gonna make it up to you and get you back on track and feeling better.”

                        “I feel fine.”

                        “Yeah. Now. Now that I’ve got you back.” He put his arms around Mick. Not an easy feat, Mick knew he was broader than Len, more muscle (and beer gut if he were honest). “And I’ll be damned if they take you again.”

                        “Not goin’ anywhere. Just us, Lisa, and LL.” Mick wrapped his arms around Len, knowing it was okay, that it was safe to do so. (Just because Len knew him for so long, doesn’t mean he gets a free ‘touch’ pass.)

                        “Speaking of the rat… Lisa’s trying to find him a harness to go with his new title… Think he’d let her put it on him…?”

                        “He might, if she bribes with food first…”

                        “I’ll let her know.” Len let go of Mick. “Now, while you make plans for our bon fire, I need to finish this section of the bank… I plan on making a clean getaway, even if Flash and his new sidekick show up.”

                        Mick gave a smile. “Sure thing.” Damn was it good to be home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter after this. Hope you've all enjoyed it so far... Even if it was a bit dark to begin with.


	30. It's Over

It’s Over

               

                        Mick groaned awake. Everything ached, thoughts racing. Then a jolt. He frowned and opened his eyes, seeing Len wide-eyed and breathing hard, shaking. A panic attack? “What’s wrong, Boss?” Mick asked, raising up and pulling Len close. Len tried to shrug him off, but failed.

                        “Bad dream…” Len whispered. Mick sighed.

                        “I had one too… Your friends ruled the world and you… Didn’t exactly treat me like an equal.” Mick spoke, keeping a hold on Len. “ ‘S how I knew it wasn’t real. You’d never do me like that…”

                        Len’s eyes got bigger. “I had the same dream…” he thought for a moment. “What if it wasn’t a dream and it was some… Alternate reality we’re remembering?” Mick snorted.

                        “Then we forget it because it obviously didn’t hold. We’re here. We’re good. We’re safe.” He kissed Len’s cheek. “We’re fine. Hell, I’ve not felt this good in a long ass time.” Len relaxed a bit. Good. He didn’t need to stress more than necessary, his blood pressure would spike.

                        “Okay. Okay.” Blue eyes started twinkling at Mick. “You know… We still got all morning before we get the jump on the Flash today…” Mick grinned.

                        “I’m in.”

\------Legends-----

 

                        Mick smirked as he fired again. “Come on, Red. You didn’t think we’d stop playing around did you?”

                        “Yeah, Scarlet. Surely you missed this just a bit.” Len fired his own blasts. Flash sped about. Mick could see the confusion on his face, even with that stupid cowl on.

                        “Snart?! You’re alive?!”

                        “Didja really think you could get rid of me that easily? This IS my city, Flash. I’m not going anywhere.” Len fired a patch of ice near the speedster’s feet.

                        Mick grinned. This was what he’d been missing. Fighting side by side with his partner. Making people squirm. And Lisa making off with the loot from the back. Another flash of speed showed up. In yellow. Mick felt tense until he realized it was a kid.

                        “When did you get the sidekick?” Len asked.

                        “I’m not a sidekick!” The young boy answered. Sounded a lot like that West reporter. Defiant. Angry. A whirlwind kicked up, forcing Len and Mick into each other.

                        “Sure. And you’re not jailbait either.” Lisa piped up from her position, firing her weapon for cover.

\-----Legends-----

 

                        Len was counting the loot while Mick looked over wounds. He’d almost forgotten how hard the kid could throw a punch. “Mick… You don’t think Scarlet let us get away do you? Just because I was dead? Because that wouldn’t be very sportsmanlike… Letting us win…” Len almost pouted. Mick shrugged.

                        “He might’ve been having an off day. Heard he pissed off the speed force and some speed god named Savitar.”

                        “Who’d you hear that from?”

                        “Rathaway… Apparently he’s swapped sides…” Len growled.

                        “I die for one lousy year and my crew starts going soft. Though I can’t blame him if he did it for Ramon… Though Lisa’ll be pissed.” Len handed Mick a wad of cash. “Your cut. Maybe we can start getting more of those fancy lighters you like.”

                        “Maybe… After we fix this place up… It’s barely livable these days.”

                        “And whose fault is that? It’s not my problem that you and Lisa fight over me.” Mick snorted.

                        “You’ve been dead.”

                        “Yeah? Well I’m not anymore.” Len stood. “Now am I?” He smirked. “Come on… Let’s have a little celebration…”

 

\-----Legends------

 

                        A crash outside caused both men to grab their weapons and aim. “Are you sure this is where he is?” A voice asked. Familiar voice. Haircut. Mick scowled. Why were they here?

                        “Gideon said this is where he’s been for the past few weeks… I’m sure he’s here.” A feminine voice spoke. Blondie. Len looked at Mick.

                        “How do you wanna play this?” He whispered. Mick growled.

                        “Might as well see what the hell they want before we send ‘em packing.” Mick walked to the area that was serving as a living room.

                        “The hell are you doing here? Thought I made it clear how I felt about you.” Mick glared, flipping on the lights. The Legends team was there, all in normal clothes.

                        “We just wanna talk, Mick… We… Realize we may not have treated you right and-” Jax started. Len tsked as he walked into view.

                        “MAY not have? MAY? Wow… And you insulted Mick’s intelligence. Hate to break it to you, hero wannabes, but you didn’t treat him right.” Len strolled between Mick and his former team. Their former team. “You treated him like a dog, and like a dog you expect him to come crawling back… That it? Sorry. Not gonna happen. Goodbye. Don’t let the door smack you.”

                        The looks on their faces made Mick smile. Len was back. And in that rare defense mode. (Rare if you weren’t Lisa or Mick that is…) “We just wanted to-” Sara tried.

                        “Go. I’m not gonna be your personal thug anymore. All I was right? A thug? You got Amaya and her millions of animal spirits. Let her be your muscle. Or hell, let Pretty over there be your new muscle. You like them better. Like everyone better.” Mick snorted. “Even liked my rat better, even though he hated you and bit you every chance he got.”

                        Ray pouted. “See? I wasn’t imagining those bites.” Stein sighed.

                        “Mr. Rory… If this is about me… I’m sorry…”

                        “No you’re not. You’re just sorry he’s done with you.” Len growled, walking up to the professor. The old man even had the decency to look scared. “He told me how he opened up to you, about hallucinating me, and then you told him he was hallucinating again back in World War Two, but low and behold I turn out to be alive and you blame him for telling me things because he thought he was hallucinating. How pathetic is that?” He looked at Sara. “And you? You had the audacity to try and be his friend while I was on your little team, only to turn as soon as you became captain? Disgraceful.”

                        “He saved your sorry asses more than once, even if I don’t recall those ass savings. But you know it happened. And you still treated him the way you did? Some heroes. Maybe you wanna switch sides too?” Mick had to pull Len back at this point, worried the man’s blood would spike and he’d hurt himself trying to hurt the others.

                        Least they had the decency to look ashamed of themselves. To remember. To feel bad. Mick glanced up at the team. His former team. “You should leave.” He told them. “Go to whatever time and place you need to be. I’m through.”

                        Amaya frowned. “So this is it? You gave a great speech to the Flash about not turning his back on his team… But you’ll do it, all the same?”

                        “You turned your backs first. You saw the signs. Hell, Gideon knew what was going on and that computer was the only one who even really attempted to help me. But you know, she can only do so much.” Mick growled. “Now leave. Before we start blasting.”

                        The Legends gave another look at Mick and Len before turning and leaving, one by one. Ray was the last one. He walked over to Mick and handed him a device. “In case you change your mind or need help… I… I’m sorry.” The only one who really seemed apologetic. Good old Haircut.

                        “Get going Haircut. Before they leave you.” Mick gestured for him to leave. Ray nodded, making his way out. Len glared.

                        “Finally they’re gone.” He looked at Mick. “Ruined a perfectly good morning… You sure we can’t…”

                        “Not worth the effort Lenny…” He gave a smile, feeling a weight lift off. It was done. He was finally done. Finally free of them. “Come on, I’ll start on breakfast and we can start planning our next heist.”

                        “No heists… Gonna help Flash… I can’t have him paying more attention to some speed god while we’re heisting, now can we?”

                        “Boss, I’m starting to think you wanna invite him in…” Mick pouted.

                        “No… No. But if a heist is gonna be fun, we all need to be at our best. He’s not at his best when he’s preoccupied.” Len pouted. Mick sighed.

                        “Better tell Lisa. You know she’ll get pissy if we work with Ramon and she doesn’t get to flirt.”

                        “Of course… After breakfast…” Len held his stomach. “My stomach is starting to growl and I’m worried it’ll eat itself...” Mick rolled his eyes as he made his way to the kitchenette. Damn drama queen.


End file.
